5 Things You Don’t Want To Hear When You’re Pregnant

Pregnancy is such an exciting time! Full of new beginnings, raging hormones and people who can’t seem to keep their comments and opinions to themselves. Don’t you find that everyone around you somehow feels the need to give you unsolicited advice or make annoying comments that you’d rather not hear when you’re pregnant?

Below are 5 things that I hated hearing when I was pregnant and that you should never say aloud to a pregnant woman.

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1. “You Look Tired”

I’m not sure when it’s ever acceptable to tell someone that they look tired; who the hell ever wants to hear that? You might as well say “you look like sh*t”, because isn’t that what you really mean?

I got this comment a few times during my pregnancy, mainly during the last couple months when fatigue was my M.O. and it is definitely something you shouldn’t say to a pregnant woman, or any woman ever.

Although I would just smile and nod when I heard it, what I really wanted to say back was “yes, I’m tired because I spend three hours a day commuting to and from work, get only three hours sleep a night because my hips are killing me and lose about a gallon of water in sweat each day, all while struggling to breath because this baby is sitting right under my lungs.”

Note to everyone on the planet: never tell a pregnant woman, or any woman for that matter, that they look tired. I’m pretty sure they can legally hit you.

  

2. “It’s Not Like You’re The First Woman To Ever Give Birth”

This comment came from a female co-worker who never had kids. I had been joking about getting myself a nice gift down the road after the birth of baby #2, when she explained that having a baby is something that happens every day and wasn’t some kind of achievement. Wow – thanks for the tip, and here I thought I was the first woman ever to do this!

There are a lot of things that a person can never truly understand about having a baby until they’ve actually had one; I know I personally underestimated  this process myself.

Getting pregnant, being pregnant and raising children is probably the most challenging part of my life. While I understand where her comment came from, it really belittled the physical and emotional challenges I was going through.

 

3. “You’re So Big!”

Doesn’t every woman, pregnant or not, just love hearing these words? Yes, I am so big! That’s what happens when you don’t have a supermodel’s body and carry around a 7 pound human in your tummy. Something else a pregnant woman doesn’t want to hear: “that’s going to be one big baby!”.

And for the record, a woman’s size while pregnant doesn’t mean the baby is going to be large, some women just get bigger than others while pregnant. 

Most surprising? This comment always came from women, some of which have had children themselves (I guess they forgot how big they were at the time?).

Maybe I’m hyper-sensitive to these things, but this was one comment that I didn’t need to hear as I watched my stretch marks grow.

pregnant comments annoying. things not to say to pregnant woman.

 

4. “If You Focus On Your Breathing, You Don’t Need An Epidural…”

…said the little Asian nurse assigned to me at the hospital while I was in labour with Iva. I kindly smiled at her while getting through another contraction and said something to the effect of “hells yes I need one!”. This is a definite no-no thing not to say to a pregnant woman, especially when they’re in labour.

As my contractions continued to get stronger and closer together, again she commented, “…just a few days ago, a woman wanted an epidural and before they could get to her, she had the baby without it. You can do it too.” Again, I replied, “No, I need the epidural. Like, now.”

Unfortunately, as my contractions continued to become more painful and the doctor finally arrived to check my progress, I was already 7-8cm dilated. The person on staff for epidurals was tied up, so the back-up was called and wouldn’t arrive for at least another half hour.

I can remember holding onto my husbands shoulders fighting through the worst contractions saying “where is the epidural?”, but I already knew that I wouldn’t be getting one. As my nurse had eerily predicted, I did in fact deliver without an epidural. Damn that woman.

 5. “You’re Eating For Two, Mangia!”

This statement was usually made while more food was being shovelled onto my plate. Yes, I am eating for two, but the tiny person in my belly doesn’t require an additional 1,000 calories on top of what I need for myself.

This issues is made even worse considering that my dad and my husband’s family are Italian, so eating a lot to them means your’re healthy and making sure the baby is healthy (a.k.a full) at the same time.

I also didn’t want to hear “that’s all you’re going to eat? you’re pregnant!” Again, I don’t want to be made to feel like I’m starving my baby because I didn’t throw back three pounds of ribs upon request. Just let me eat my two pounds of ribs in peace.

 

What annoying pregnancy comments drove you nuts when you were pregnant? What other things should I add to my list of things not to say to a pregnant woman?

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7 thoughts on “5 Things You Don’t Want To Hear When You’re Pregnant”

  1. Oh my goodness, it’s so shocking what people actually say! I’m not pregnant and haven’t had any kids yet but I would never say any of these things to someone who is. Saying “you look tired” is so rude, no one likes to be told they look like an exhausted wreck. Whenever my friends are pregnant I always just tell them they look beautiful and have a gorgeous little bump. It’s such a beautiful thing that women can literally grow a baby inside them so I definitely think people should be much more aware of what they’re saying.
    Holly x / https://www.bloglovin.com/blogs/chronicles-holly-13610625 / http://www.thechroniclesofholly.com/

  2. Pingback: 6 Ideas For A Healthy Bucket List - Blush & Pearls

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